What’s your decade of music?

I remember myself sitting (sometimes lying) on the couch and listening to different albums of my favorite bands and artists. I can last for hours doing nothing but that. And when I say lasting for hours, it’s probably listening to the same album on repeat.

So why am I mentioning it? Cause hell yeah I’m doing exactly the same thing right now! I opened my spotify and made a playlist of all the songs from my high school days. Started with Natie Imbruglia’s Torn, added Jennifer Love-Hewitt’s BareNaked, and a whole lot more! I even made different categories for the whole decade 2000-2010. There were a lot on the list and I haven’t done the 90’s yet. Don’t even get me started with my boyband playlist. Hihi

It feels soooo goooood! I don’t know why I’m happy about it but it’s my jam. It kinda set me in the mood and suddenly all my problems were flushed down the toilet. 

You know how everybody has their own decade of favorite songs? I thought that applies only to old people. Or maybe it’s just me getting old? Lol Never the less, I therefore conclude that I can relate and I have a theory!!!
I think maybe our favorite songs are usually from our childhood because  we remember those times when we were so careless and we don’t need to think about anything else. We were just plain having fun. Maybe some parts of us are longing for those times and it left us a mark through those specific songs. Who knows maybe we can remember those memories through smell or even food! 

We like how it feels and we’ll keep playing those songs to keep that feeling alive again.

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Blogging Is A Therapy

There are certain times in our lives that we get so preoccupied (and lost) in our life, problems, responsibilities, jobs and many more that we forget to breathe once in a while.

I think you guys know what I mean. That happened to my 2015. Too many things had happened that I didn’t get enough time for myself to sit back and think about random stuff without any pressure at all. If someone’s going to ask me HOW MY 2015 WAS, I’m just going to answer some experiences and that’s just it. Where was my growth?

Thinking about it, there was a lot. Now, I’m trying to recall and it feels like everything is eating me. Which is which? What did I learn after this and that experience? There were too many that I forgot how it felt like.

Everytime I lose myself with my problems and responsibilities, I take my time and read my previous posts. It’s something to remind me of who I am, what kind of person I am, how I think, and my perspectives in life. I wasn’t able to write for months because I was too preoccupied.

It’s a bit frustrating that I didn’t blog much this year and sorry for that. I wanted to re-read some of my blog posts but there’s nothing much.

Writing and blogging is a therapy for me. It’s an outlet to release feelings, opinions I am not able to tell (or just something I want to share), and reflections in life.

2016 is a few hours away and I’m putting BLOGGING on top of my NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTION.

Will be reading blogs again too! I’ve missed everyone! HAPPY NEW YEAR!

How Do I Write Again?

Is it really possible that we constantly change? I mean we adapt to different situations but somehow it struck us one way or the other, right?

This I question because somehow I felt that I changed… well I think I do. Sometimes I feel like I am the better me, sometimes I am lost. I haven’t written or posted anything for months except the entry before this. I think I forgot to write. I don’t know what to write. There was a point in my life that there’s just too many thoughts, reflections and realizations everyday. And it just pops out of my head to a point that I needed to write it right away cause I might forget.

Now, I don’t know what to write about. I wanted to blog again but I don’t want to tell a story about my day cause it’s boring. I don’t want to brag about my problems cause it’s not healthy and I’m handling it anyway. I wanted to write about my recent experience on working with a film company here in the Philippines, got to meet movie actors but nah… I wanted to find those random thoughts I used to write about, wisdom I get from every problem, Reflections and positive outlook in life but where is it now?

Have I changed? Or was I just pre occupied? I wanted that part of myself back. I love those posts and I still want to inspire a lot of readers. How cab I be inspired? What do I do?

I Don’t Wanna Be Ordinary… Nor Special.

Today, I realized that I don’t wanna be ordinary… nor special. Is it weird for me to think that way? I really don’t know how to explain it. When I was younger (maybe 10 years younger), I wanted to be an icon – an actress, a singer, a musician, a painter or just someone famous. Apart from me being talkative and really out going, I have no problem with people at all… singing, playing, talking, acting on stage is nothing and I love being on stage, no nervous breakdowns or anything similar, I wanted to make a difference – jeez it’s lame and this is overused already. Let me put it this way, I have this thing called perception in life. And my theory is that if only people look at life the way I do, things would be simple, easy and beautiful. But at that time, if I try to say anything about “it” and open words or realizations and reflections, I would be super duper uncool. That is why I wanted to be famous. I wanted to establish a name and/or a reputation so that I wouldn’t be judge. Silly, am I right?

But after all I’ve been through, problems in my family, relationships, friends, school, career, work and everything else in between, I don’t want to dream the same dream. Now, I think that I’d like to work behind curtains and cameras in life. I know most of us wanted the spotlight, it’s a good feeling but I think it’s far too complicated and my life has been a mess and there are a lot of consequences that comes with it. I am longing for simple and care free life. Though we can’t avoid problems along the way, I couldn’t care less at all. I realized that I love living backstage at life. I am a family kind of person whatever I dream of, I dream for them. I never had a dream (the usual one, like I want to be a doctor someday stuff). I was and always be contented just as long as my family is safe, healthy, happy and we can eat three times a day… that’s that. Today, I realized that whatever it is I dreamed of doing, I keep coming back to that simple thing and I am always joyful and contented with that. Other than that, I’d like to make a big money so that I can go volunteer and provide on charities and different foundations… or maybe start one. I like it the way it is.

I don’t want to be cool. I don’t want to fit in. I don’t want to stand out. I don’t wanna be ordinary. I don’t wanna be special. I want to be in somebody’s (a family, a friend, a lover or anyone) life, never leave and make sure I love more than anyone could possibly do.